You Come First
by Tabitha Murphy
I have a personal story I wish to share about myself. I have spent many years of my life taking care of others, being concerned about their wants and needs and in the shuffle I lost myself. I have never really truly been on my “own”. I had my children at a very young age and before I knew it I was married and settled down with my husband for 19yrs. Now, don’t get me wrong, I love my children and my husband but in all of the years of taking care of them I forgot how to take care of me.
I found myself gradually. I started doing small things for myself like buying shoes, getting my nails done, and every now I then I would really splurge and get a massage. However, it was not until this past year that I realized that I did not know who I was or what I wanted until my sister asked me a simple question; “What makes you happy?”. I was a little stunned because I started naming what makes my husband and children happy but I hadn't the slightest idea of what made me happy. Hell, I am still thinking about what I want to be when I grow up! So I had to sit down and think about this phenomenal question! What makes me happy? What makes me think that I am happy if I do not know what makes me happy to begin with? I mean, I love the things that most females enjoy; Long walks, movies, dinner, ect. But these are things that I do with my family not with myself.
So, although I feel my journey is almost complete I am still finding out so much about myself. I realized that I am not as shy as I thought I was! (Laughing out loud) Let me explain that because for those who know me, I know they are saying, “Yeah right!” I am really shy within my own right! I didn’t t realize I was really shy until it was time for me to get in front of the camera and model for my own magazine. My first photo shoot I was shaking like a leaf. My younger sister got in front of that camera and worked it. But me? I was like Oh my God what have I gotten myself into. I can't do this. Although, I still don t like the camera, I am now able to get in front of it and do what I have to do.
I guess my point is, that by experiencing life and getting out there and just throwing caution to the wind; I have found out so much about myself. I’ve learned over the years that I love sushi and love to travel. I didn’t t realize how much of my own dreams I had given up so I can please everyone else. So now I want to pass these questions on to you:
Who are you?
What makes you happy?
What do you want out of life?
What are your desires?
What are your wants?
If you are having trouble answering these questions, try this. First: Know that you are not alone. Second: It is time to re-evaluate yourself.
If the first thought that comes into your mind is of your husband or children (anyone other than yourself) then you need to take a time out and think about yourself.
Remember you come first and if you don’t believe this then no one else will.
by Tabitha Murphy
I have a personal story I wish to share about myself. I have spent many years of my life taking care of others, being concerned about their wants and needs and in the shuffle I lost myself. I have never really truly been on my “own”. I had my children at a very young age and before I knew it I was married and settled down with my husband for 19yrs. Now, don’t get me wrong, I love my children and my husband but in all of the years of taking care of them I forgot how to take care of me.
I found myself gradually. I started doing small things for myself like buying shoes, getting my nails done, and every now I then I would really splurge and get a massage. However, it was not until this past year that I realized that I did not know who I was or what I wanted until my sister asked me a simple question; “What makes you happy?”. I was a little stunned because I started naming what makes my husband and children happy but I hadn't the slightest idea of what made me happy. Hell, I am still thinking about what I want to be when I grow up! So I had to sit down and think about this phenomenal question! What makes me happy? What makes me think that I am happy if I do not know what makes me happy to begin with? I mean, I love the things that most females enjoy; Long walks, movies, dinner, ect. But these are things that I do with my family not with myself.
So, although I feel my journey is almost complete I am still finding out so much about myself. I realized that I am not as shy as I thought I was! (Laughing out loud) Let me explain that because for those who know me, I know they are saying, “Yeah right!” I am really shy within my own right! I didn’t t realize I was really shy until it was time for me to get in front of the camera and model for my own magazine. My first photo shoot I was shaking like a leaf. My younger sister got in front of that camera and worked it. But me? I was like Oh my God what have I gotten myself into. I can't do this. Although, I still don t like the camera, I am now able to get in front of it and do what I have to do.
I guess my point is, that by experiencing life and getting out there and just throwing caution to the wind; I have found out so much about myself. I’ve learned over the years that I love sushi and love to travel. I didn’t t realize how much of my own dreams I had given up so I can please everyone else. So now I want to pass these questions on to you:
Who are you?
What makes you happy?
What do you want out of life?
What are your desires?
What are your wants?
If you are having trouble answering these questions, try this. First: Know that you are not alone. Second: It is time to re-evaluate yourself.
If the first thought that comes into your mind is of your husband or children (anyone other than yourself) then you need to take a time out and think about yourself.
Remember you come first and if you don’t believe this then no one else will.